When I was home visiting with my parents I heard about two pretty sad updates with family friends. One is a gentleman from their church, who I’ve met and really like, who has the same terminal brain cancer that killed Ted Kennedy. In fact, this friend went into the hospital for surgery and was in the ICU while I was visiting. The other story was of another family friend who had to suddenly retire from his job as an executive at a global Fortune 500 because his cancer was forcing him to be put on a feeding tube.
I’ve worked at a company where we had to deal with HIPPA regulations, so I understand how people are afraid of discrimination when they reveal an illness or condition. But the two men above both have incredibly aggressive forms of cancer. They’re kind of hard to hide.
So what do you do?
I wrestle with this myself because I go through cycles with doctors. On August 13, 2006 I was hit on the back corner of my Civic by a Dodge Caravan. The other driver had tried to merge into a lane with a motorcycle in his blind spot and overcorrected. The air was dry, the sky was clear, and it was a Sunday. There was very little traffic on the freeway. Yet I was hit by a vehicle probably going at least 65mph.
I spun out three times and stopped with the driver’s side facing the oncoming traffic. A second car barely stopped a couple feet from me. I was told I’m lucky to be alive.
Since then I’ve been visiting doctors pretty regularly for my back. The spin out wrenched my upper back to the point that it will probably always need to be seen. I’m also susceptible to psychosomatic pain, especially during stressful driving, such as in heavy rain or snow.
For the most part, I can manage things. However, there will be times when I have to see my doctor two or three times a week to get straightened out, to have the pain worked out. I don’t want to take medications because I can’t function.
I have been lucky, because I have bosses who understand. I had actually been working with the team in DC when I had the accident, so they already knew. In MN, I share upfront that there may be times when I have visits on my calendar or may have to work from home to be more comfortable. Everyone is understanding.
Some aren’t as comfortable sharing as I am. Some have more severe conditions to deal with. But what happens to our body and mind affects our work. So I know I have to work on the balance.
Should you disclose medical issues to your boss? How will that affect your work? How will that affect your team? Are there other alternatives?
The views expressed in my blog are my own and do not necessarily reflect those of my employer.
Photo from Clipart.
I think this is a tough call. I definitely have a hard time sharing when I need to take time for myself for a personal problem. I think you are handling it the right way – and that we all have to become more comfortable with honesty so that we can treat each other like humans instead of just..productivity machines.
Thanks for sharing this with all of us!!
Thanks Beth for the comment. I know some bosses may consider it over-sharing, but my case, for instance, under-informing might cause someone to think I'm constantly leaving the job for something non-work related. And while that's true to a certain extent, I do make up the time somewhere else. I think in times like these, honesty can keep mistrust at bay…
Have a good one!
Just came across your story while googling “Should a boss be understanding to personal issues”. It seems we all have unfortunate mishaps in life that prevents us from performing to our full potential. I myself just went through a very tough time with my own self medical issues, along with a break up of a 3 year relationship, which landed my partner in a hospital from a suicide attempt, to losing the family dog & a cousin who lost the fight with mouth cancer. Let’s just say 2009 could’ve been a better year for me LOL. My attendance started to reflect poorly, the president of the company took notice and pulled me in for a talk. She started out with questions for concern, instead of questioning like a judge. I was honest, I’ve only been employed by this company for 16 months and I told her I know she has not seen who I really am. I guess what i’m say is, we all struggle with juggling our professional lives along with our personal. Thankfully for me, she was very understanding to my situation and actually recommended that I started taking Valiums to help me sleep and to go out for a drink at night to meet new people. These are words of advice my younger sister would give me, definately wasn’t expecting to hear that from the Head Chief! My next blog will be about our next talk of my “Valium & Drinking” problem i’ve aquired. Cheers to a new year and a new beginning. Alicia