When I was a waitress, I worked in a Mediterranean restaurant that was owned by a couple of Greek families. They were trying to bring together the loud, large family atmosphere with fine dining. Special events would have belly dancers, and we would light food on fire on a regular basis. Even though I thought I was a smart cookie, I was a little intimidated. I was so nervous that I doubted myself.
This is the worst thing you can ever do.
One of my first banquet shifts had a champagne toast, and we had to move flutes from the front bar to the back room. I was still having issues balancing trays so I put the flutes on their sides so I could avoid breaking them. The manager saw me and said, “No, stand them up, you’ll get more on the tray.” I did what she said, and turned to go on my way.
CRASH!!!!!
At least eight of the flutes fell off the tray, and there was nothing I could do about it. I was mortified, but worse, I was upset that I didn’t stick with my own common sense. I knew I wasn’t going to balance the tray. Why did I do the opposite?
From that moment on, I decided to not only listen to myself, but to fully commit. I managed to break four or five of those heavy pint glasses after a kid ran into me. Instead of stopping and turning a bright shade of red, I threw my tray into the air and yelled, “OPA!”
It turned out that committing was more necessary than I originally thought.
We had a dish called Saganaki, which is a style of cooking a cheese that gets served en flambé. After picking up the searing hot dish from the pass, you end up standing in front of a table, lighter in hand, and praying you aren’t going to end up with singed eyebrows. You need to get the brandy on, light it fast (the dish is so hot, you don’t want the alcohol cooked off), and then after the flames touch the ceiling, you bring them down with squeezed lemon.
Did I mention you might lose your eyebrows?
If you’re afraid of the fire, you’ll probably smell burned hair. I’ve seen it happen. If you’re nervous, you hold the dish closer to your body and lean forward too much. Insecurity turns into actual danger. When you make it part of the show, you lean back, put the flames on display, and you get to keep your eyebrows.
There are times when you need to trust your gut, and you really need to commit.
What are your stories of breaking glasses and lighting cheese on fire? How did you know doubting yourself wasn’t going to serve you? When did you find committing made all the difference?
Photo credit (and yes, that’s what flaming Saganaki looks like, Opa!)
This is intense. I read somewhere a couple days ago that your worst jobs could actually be your best because they give you skills you wouldn’t get in corporate settings. Looks like it worked out pretty well for you. I think the best time to be self-confident is usually at job interviews-if people can tell you don’t think you know your stuff, they won’t hire you.
Hi Vicki, you’re right, we don’t always take the time when things are rough to realize that they’re great learning experiences. You just want to get through them in one piece! I do take a moment some days to think about when things were crazy, what did I learn? I’m surprised sometimes. And confidence during interviews is key. I have been told to be sure you understand the fine line between confident and cocky. That’s one you want to know. Thanks!
[…] brings it at a Greek […]
The lessons from your story are so true! I spent 3 1/2 years of college working in a very fast-paced bar/restaurant. In the beginning, if a customer was upset about something I would get nervous/flustered and scrambled to “fix” it. As time when on, I learned that being upfront and having the attitude of “I’m an amazing server and I am going to do my best to make sure your experience here is the best it can be” won my customers over and greatly improved my tips 🙂 It’s amazing how confidence in yourself can not only get others to trust you, but also help you trust in yourself.
You know how they say that dogs can smell fear? So can customers…I would get so nervous and flustered when I first started. Tables would eat me alive! I’m kind of glad I don’t have to go back to serving just yet, but I only hope I can get back into the swing of things with confidence. I try to think of that at my current job, too. Confidence is handy, what can I say? Thanks Lesley!
It’s funny how when we get nervous we try way too hard, and just end up making things worse. If we just learn to be ourselves and laugh at our silly mistakes instead of dwelling on them, we’d probably be happier and more successful people. Did your eyebrows twitch when you wrote this post? 🙂
Hi Sam! I will say, this did made me think of those really awkward movies where you get embarrassed for the main character…almost like when you want to yell at the screen, “Stop talking!” Because you’re right, it usually comes down to lack of confidence. I luckily didn’t burn off my eyebrows, but I can see the scene playing out in my head very clearly. And if it were a movie, it’d be the shy boy who has no idea what he’s doing waiting tables when he has an engineering degree but it’s a recession and oh yeah, what did you want to drink?
Hmmm, girl+cheese+fire=Yummmmm!